Don't Tread on Me

I hope everyone knows I hate talking around things. I'd much rather everyone just get in a room all together with someone to say :


"OK, now it's your turn to say your part, so that we can be accord. We will speak honestly or not at all, and no one gets to leave until it's all been weighed legitimately, fairly and for the greatest good." 


Unfortunately, most people are too afraid to reveal their motivations to do this. 
I'd be glad if tomorrow morning, I woke up and this was the case. 
I know that's a dream. 


We simply don't have time to hear everyone's points of view, and too many people want to scheme, plot and have their own agendas finalized before public revelations. 


Besides, not revealing motivations is part of the fun, it's like saying: Hey! I'm gonna do something really great, and it's for everyone. But I want some other great satisfaction from it all and you can't have any of that. 


The thing most people don't realize is how many others really are a part of their fuck-ups, their fantastic triumphs and sometimes even their schemes. Writers get to mix in everything. If I wrote about your major disaster, I'm now also part of it. If I write about your loss, it's mine. I wrote it. I own a piece of it now, for better or worse. 


Having an it's easier to ask forgiveness than permission attitude only makes it easier for the ones who are trying to skirt the bigger pictures. And most of the time each person's part is but one pixel. But one idea grows and grows and one can create a snowball of momentum in Attitude. Some have figured out that most people don't think for themselves and have realized how easy it is to make alterations in public opinion without telling them WHY.


Wouldn't you rather just have it out in the open so you can decide if something is good or not? What kind of heroes are the glory-seekers if their stated purposes never match their motivations? 


Occasionally our attitudes spread the color of our minds to those around us and we are forced to face as much of ourselves as we can quite literally stand. A blue pixel turns green, another purple, they're stained. 


Stains spread. They mar the surface. I notice things like that.


Today my quote on facebook.com is: 


"Remind me to write a popular article on the compulsive reading of news. The theme will be that most neuroses and some psychoses can be traced to the unnecessary and unhealthy habit of daily wallowing in the troubles and sins of five billion strangers. The title is 'Gossip Unlimited' — no, make that 'Gossip Gone Wild.'" Jubal Harshaw from "Stranger in a Strange Land"


I hate gossip. I deplore dealing with confidential conversations and fishing for attitudes on things that should be made clear to all, far and near. I usually hate what I find out from these even more than the act of gaining the information which includes just asking for it, but also offering my own pixels to the mix.


Answers start as questions. 


Anxiety starts as questions too. Who to trust, who to distrust, who to listen to, whose motivations are on the level, who is seeking status, who is out for themselves, who is for the greatest good, who could care less, who gets their panties twisted all up when they don't get their own way? And really, just really, how much does any of that matter when it comes down to things going on and whether they should? Or whether the outcomes will be better or worse than expected? 


Staying out of it usually just means keeping my eye off the ball and waiting for a hit. Only rarely do I feel like it's headed my way. I don't know about the rest of you, but I don't want to be clocked in the jaw for a lack of interest. If it affects me personally and I don't step up to address it, am I then any less culpable than others who were just looking away to placate some other power?


I think I'm used to disappointment enough to know that I don't get a say, and I don't have a way. Not unless I make a way, say, yay, nay, and good day for myself. But the tighter I feel like I must wind myself around my interactions, the more likely I will soon be seeking the sun. And even then, my influence is most harmless. 


But as a reminder to those who make heavy foot-falls all around and enjoy throwing weight: DON'T TREAD ON ME.